Caged: Frankenstein Logan vs The Freakshow Okun

We are looking down the barrel of the end of the world. When probably the last survivors of mankind descend upon a creepy bunker, the scientist is, of course, the tour guide to potential answers. 

Whether you're dealing with dopey flesh eating rubes, or threateningly huge ufos decimating everything in sight, you will require some pretty heavy duty reassurance. Unfortunately, we got these guys.

Into the cage goes Dr. Logan of Day Of The Dead, and Independence Day's Dr. Okun.

WHY THEY ARE REQUIRED

Major cities are holes in the ground. The planet is surrounded by enormous saucers, piloted by mini Cthulu wannabes using windows 98. Will Smith has just pasted one of them for demeaning his wife. The fighter pilot president opts to take a trip to Area 51 for some kind of answers.

Doctor Okun (Brent Spiner) the reclusive 24/7 scientist has been studying the threat for decades, following the Roswell crash, way back when. He keeps the doomed Roswell crew in oversized tanks. He even recovered the ship itself, which is kept in a huge hangar. Surely, he has the answers to stop the alien menace.

The zombie plague has reached very successful proportions. There are precious few homes left for survivors. Farmhouses are OUT. The mall is most definitely OUT. Somewhere far away, Dennis Hopper is setting up a private haven for rich assholes off the grid. A dozen brave souls have hunkered down in an abandoned mine, complete with military posts, labs with oddly placed crucifixes, and a shag pad for the helicopter pilot and sidekick. 

The pressure is on to see what final play the survivors can cook up to save the species. Enter Doctor Logan aka Dr Frankenstein (Richard Liberty).

HE'S GOT THE LOOK

Stop! Fit check! For some reason, both of these guys are very fond of the dirty white lab coat look, and some 5 o clock grey shadow. 

They both feature some shaggy uncombed grey hair , though Okun went full grunge, where Logan kept it shorter. After all, zombies can pull your hair.

They complete the look with some scientist glasses, and some plucky personalities.

They have the look, but do they have the magic touch to save humanity?

GIVE US A SOLUTION, DAMN IT!

After some brief gushing before the president, Okun immediately starts giving the low down on the aliens, and the cyber suits they inhabit. He also let's them know that his downed ship can now fly (wink), though he knows their shielding is a huge problem. It's not until Jeff Goldblum's cable expert figures out some basic hacking can down their shields, that the plan comes into effect. Bad look for Okun, but a live, unconscious aliens sudden arrival, offers him some chance of redemption, right? Right?

The nerds of the bunker are getting a little unsure of themselves. The hardened jarhead forced into leadership is waving his gun around. His second in command is peppering the main characters with some very over the top racism. Doctor Frankenstein is their last hope for a solution for their dire circumstances.

That solution: Domestication. Yes, domestication of drooling, brain dead cannibals. Oh, Logan. 

We meet his prized subject, Bub (Howard Sherman), who is not quick to bite, but also can't work a telephone. Beautiful theory, but not one to be employed on a mass scale. Some flashes of former humanity a solution does not make.

THE END RESULT 

Okun immediately hauls in the out of town alien pilot, for some quick...surgery? Dissection? Quick play for some creature goo scene? Check!

Things get pear-shaped fast when the alien's lack of anesthetic is apparent, and he gets out of bed, pretty pissed off, and murdering everyone in the room. 

Okun is subsequently used as a vetriloquist dummy for the alien, basically telling the humans to suck a dick, before being quickly dispatched by soldiers.

THE OKUN SOLUTION = BIG FAT FAIL

Dr. Logan remains convinced that Bub is somehow the key to everything. After all, he DID figure out how to turn on a tape recorder. 

Putting his faith on a dead hippie's green shoulders proves fatal, as the cabin fever soldiers finally fire Frankenstein, minus a pink slip. 

This creates a bit of a curious incident, as Bub responds to Logan's death with emotion, and turns against the soldiers. Does this mean Bub becomes the savior of humanity as a result?

THE LOGAN SOLUTION = BIG FAT FAIL

THE BUB SOLUTION! 

Ok, so Bub makes it about 20 feet past his enclosure, BUT manages to plug Rhodes a couple of times for shooting his lab coat buddy. Vengeance worked for Bub, and he tops it off with a soldier salute.

DID THE WORLD END?

Not at all. Or at least, both films end on a hopeful note, and I'm sure everything is going to be OK.

Our scientists kind of shit the bed here, but both actors delivered wonderful performances that were scene stealing, at the very l. And in the face of doomsday, that should count for something.

Ok, maybe not. RIP.